🎶Gotta catch 'em all, 2C-B!🎶

Dunno if you’re still looking for input, but I did say I’d have more to say about this once I did it, so here it is:

I helped show someone to one of the camps when I was wandering about, and they gave me a great piece of advice: you can think of burns basically as a giant version of the smoke pit outside a rave or a club. Everyone’s having a good time, and 99% of people are open to whatever kind of pro-social interaction from the other participants.

Beyond this, unless people at theme camps are literally knee-deep in logistics/organizing specific stuff, they want you to talk with them. They want you to eat and drink the stuff they have on offer, sit in their plounges gabbing about whatever, poking the interactive stuff they made, asking random questions or sharing random stories (a good story is a gift!), etc. Basically, it’s a safe assumption that people will act like they (and in 99.9% of cases truly do) want you there being part of the action, as your most authentic self.

If you’re anything like me - a little more on the introverted side in unfamilar surroundings - it’s a bit of an adjustment. If you want to be left alone and communicate this, people will leave you alone. But if you want to participate, you will be welcomed with open arms, even if you’re a little awkward. ‘We welcome the stranger’, at least in my experience with the burn I went to, isn’t just lip service. It’s true.

Even if we put all of that aside, you know what’s cool? Seeing a giant ass structure doused in accelerants go up in flames. The burns went incredibly well, and it was certainly something to see in its own right.

Bro - pull the trigger on this. I really do think you’d have a good time.

Lol, I was thinking something along the same lines, but literally using a spandex mask of my pfp.

Hey homie, I see you’re a Canadian, so if you also are an Ottawan and want a sympathetic ear I’d be happy to buy you a beer and chat, and/or help you drown it out for an evening with pinball and loud guitars if that’s your speed. Serious offer - if it’s of interest don’t hesitate to PM, if not no worries whatsoever. Edit: Shit - based on your MP you’re not. Offer amended to if you take a trip out here/an open PM inbox

There’s a lot of good comments in this thread. In my experience, it’s a combination of factors - sometimes a product of your ex shit talking you to your friends, if they were “both of your friends”; often, simply a lack of ability to really relate/be helpful in these situations, and over time getting frustrated with that situation and just saying “bro, get over it”. Guys often have a hard time sharing their emotions or holding space for those of their friends, for a lot of reasons.

I have more thoughts on this stuff, but don’t know if they would be useful to you. The only thing I can tell you is that it can be a dark, lonely and painful road. But it can get better, and to be crude - it is 100% not worth killing yourself over some bitch (because, based on what you’ve shared, that’s how she specifically was behaving and acting towards you) who made you feel like shit for a long time. All that would mean is that you let her define how your life ended. Fuck. That. You’re worth more than that.

Better - you mix it up once and a while, so that ‘yes’ or ‘no’ is not always a given.

Based on your definition of chav (I too thought tracksuits, trainers, and UK urban slang), think about the kind of hobbies folks like this do. Dunno if it’s an exact equivalent, but if someone was looking for a redneck here in Canada, they’d be going to car and truck shows/events, hunting events, small town bars, fishing derbies, small circuit pro-wrestling events, farm/harvest festivals, county fairs, that kind of thing.

Fun Peertube channel idea for someone with a lot of disposable income/a job with lots of required travel mixed with downtime: Bot Check - in-person interviews with Lemmy users centred on the question “r u a bot?”

…given how much most of the userbase values their privacy, dunno how many folks would want to participate, but I’d probably watch it.