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Joined 2 years ago
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Cake day: July 2nd, 2023

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  • Jesus Christ, yes, I am a comfort hunter. You think I get up at the ass crack of dawn every day for fun? You think I want to push buttons on a computer all day because I’m just weirdly into it?

    No! I do this shit because I have to!

    Fucking hell. I’ve already accepted that I have to make your company money if I want to live in a house. For the love of all that is good in this world, PLEASE do not make me pretend to like it. I’m already weirded out that you’re so into it.


  • Disorganized list b/c I can’t be assed to format:

    1. The follicles on your face will grow at different rates. Even if you’re going for length, trimming your beard to let the slower hairs catch up can give you a fuller and thicker beard. I will sometimes take some electric clippers and just trim back the faster growing hairs to give my beard a more defined shape.

    2. Trim the sides & mustache occasionally. Imagine a line starting a half inch or so away from your face, starting where your hair ends & sideburns begin and going straight down to the ground. Trim the sides of your beard following that line, and trim your mustache to stop the hairs from getting in your mouth. A santa-esque beard is longer than it is wide, so you’ll probably need to shape it that way.

    3. Your facial hair will probably wick moisture away from your skin. You’re already out ahead of this with the beard oil, which is great. I personally prefer using a beard butter, but anything that keeps the skin underneath moisturized is important. One time I shaved & it almost looked like my cheeks had been sunburned.

    4. This one is personal preference, but I keep my neck mostly shaved. I draw a line starting two fingers above my Adam’s apple, and bring it up to the corners of my jaw. Everything below gets either shaved or at least hit with the clippers on the lowest guard. I also take my wife’s eyebrow razor and clean up the top of my cheeks, to straighten out the top of my beard. Totally optional, but makes it look cleaner IMO.

    TL;DR Growing a beard =/= not shaving. Trim it to give it shape, shave neck & the top of your cheeks to give it lines, continue to moisturize / oil it.