25+ yr Java/JS dev
Linux novice - running Ubuntu (no windows/mac)

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Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: October 14th, 2024

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  • I don’t like being recreationally high. I have tried several times. I’ll take cannabis to help me sleep when I have insomnia, so it’s not just being anti-drug, I just don’t like it. My son in law thinks weed is the greatest thing in the world. Sometimes I do it with him just to be social.

    The last time I partook, I sat in a chair for the entirety of a documentary about that sub implosion trying to decide if I needed to go throw up and whether I could make it without bouncing off walls and possibly the floor. By the end, I barely managed to take my ass to the guest room and fall asleep.

    On the other hand, alcohol helps me cope with social anxiety.


  • There’s enough biological diversity that fairness is basically an illusion anyway. I don’t care enough about sports to have a strong opinion. I think it’s fine to say giving up competitive sports is a cost of gender transition. I might think it’s also fine to let trans athletes compete except I would hate it if the women’s league became the trans league or if poor young kids felt pressure to transition in order to compete at a higher level and get life-changing scholarships or even a professional career.

    Is that a legitimate fear? Maybe not. At the end of the day, I rarely watch sports. I would support letting them compete and seeing if it is a problem before passing laws to fix issues that don’t actually exist.


  • I agree up to the point where the amendment is pointed at as disallowing reasonable regulation. If that’s the case, end 2A. But my goal is regulation, not abolishment. If 2A folks (mainly the Supreme Court here) can accept regulation existing in parallel with 2A, then I’m happy.

    I’m mainly thinking about preventing school shootings and domestic violence and murder, so restrictions of some sort on mental health / violent history.





  • My kids are my legacy. Whether that’s positive or negative is up to them at this point.

    Regardless of that, I used to be terrified of dying. When I was younger because I hadn’t experienced or accomplished anything. Heck, George Lucas planned nine Star Wars film’s and I couldn’t die before I’d seen them all! (In retrospect, maybe that wasn’t as important as it seemed at the time.) Getting older it was because my family wasn’t ready.

    Now I’m in my fifties and my body is already falling apart. My dad and father in law are in better physical shape than me due to back and joint issues. My kids are pretty close to self-sustaining — as much as they’ll ever be.

    I’m as immortal as someone without big ambitions can be. I’ll never have a statue or exhibit in a museum or book written about me, but I’d be pretty happy with a park bench in a scenic spot. I don’t want to be buried, but it would be nice to have that as a place anyone who cares to could go and remember me — not some gaudy marble surrounded by death.

    What more could I want other than people who love me and remember me for a time? And between now and the end, I’ve got things to keep me busy. Computer games and learning woodworking. Travel. Continuing to grow as a person. I’m not done living by any means, but I’m okay with dying. I imagine it’ll suck at the time, but all things end. Even the universe.


  • I am monogamous through experience. Early in my relationship with my wife we explored various forms of non-monogamy. I can’t swing. I need an emotional connection before I can bring myself to be sexual with another person. I had two girlfriends, and for the most part I was only comfortable having sex with them in the context of a three-way, while my wife is straight. She likes other women’s bodies, but doesn’t have a desire to go further than touching their boobs or having a BDSM scene.

    She only had one person she was interested in sex with. I was supportive but also didn’t like waiting at home while she went off. Never went further than a handjob because he wasn’t comfortable with the scene.

    We gave it a shot and I’m not interested in pursuing non-monogamy. I’d still let her have a shot, but she’s into perimenopause and I don’t think she is into sex much any more. My dick has always been unreliable and it has gotten even moreso in my fifties.

    I do sometimes wish I had someone to go out with because my wife doesn’t want to really go anywhere or do anything unless it involves getting drunk and country music. But I’m also kinda autistic and my ability to communicate my mind without hurting someone’s feelings is limited. So I just… deal. My life is pretty good even if I dream of something more it’s probably not realistic and definitely not worth risking what I have.










  • My wife got me a bartesian for Christmas last year. It makes the worst fucking drinks I’ve ever had in my life. It takes up space in my kitchen. The drink pods are like $3 each. It takes cleaning and maintenance. I hate everything about it.

    I acted happy about it. Privately seethed and ranted. I literally would rather have gotten nothing than wasted money on that. And then I tried several drinks from it before “deciding” I had fun mixing my own drinks, but I still use it for guests and for her drinks that she likes.

    I think it’s god awful but I realized it made her happy and that is something I treasure. I don’t know if there’s anything in there for you to take away, but I can relate. Sometimes we just put on a happy face and let our loved ones enjoy giving us something.